No matter how much you stay positive in your life, there will always be a number of people you encounter that brings out the negative. As the year kicks off, it is time to make ourselves invincible to these people. On this episode, Scott discusses some of the “grinches” that you need to avoid and how to deal with them around the holidays. Scott dives deep into the multiple faces of the Grinch and shares some insights and advices on how you can overcome them for a great year ahead not only in business but also in life.
Listen to the podcast here:
We have a big five-year goal. We’re at the end of year one out of five to educate and create over 10,000 note investors. We’ve done a tremendous job this year and thank you to all of you who have joined us here. We’ve hit our first-year goal. We’re well on our way to hitting our year-five goal as well. Big shout out to members of the WCN Crew Facebook group. We exceeded 900 members during Note CAMP. We’re up to 930 now. Thank you for being a part of it. If you’re a student of ours, has been through our workshop and through Note CAMP, listen to the podcast. Do me a favor, go on over type the WCN Crew. Shoot me a message on Facebook, “Scott, I listen to you.” I love to add you to the most active and the most powerful Facebook group when it comes to note investing out there. It’s not all about me posting things. I don’t post that much there. A lot of other people post things there: questions, comments, concerns, great feedback that everybody’s doing and it’s one of the best things that we’ve done.
We’ve got a busy upcoming schedule. This dives into the first couple of months of 2019. We have our first Fast Track Training of 2019, January 11th to 13th here in Austin. That following weekend, I will be in the Bahamas with my buddy, Jeffrey Taylor, Mr. Landlord. He does his retreat up there every year. I’m excited to be there. I’ll be speaking on the 17th and then also hanging out with 150 to 200 other people there at that event. Quest Trust is also having an online summit on that same week, on the 18th to the 20th. It’s three days: Friday, Saturday, Sunday. They’ve got tickets right now at 50% off. If you go to QuestTrust.com, look at their events. If you’re part of the WCN membership, there’s a special coupon code for you that gives you even an extra $50 off. You’re going to have $0.25 on the dollar. You’ve got to take advantage of that relatively soon before the 15th.
There is an online multifamily investors summit that weekend too that my buddy, Dan Hambright, is doing. I’ll be speaking on that remotely. Tickets to that are $197. If you’re a WCN member, you can get a better discount code for you as well there. Start saving immediately this year. If you’re in Orlando, you may want to show up to Jillian Sidoti, Gene Trowbridge, CrowdfundingLawyers.net’s Ultimate Crowdfunding Secrets. It’s February 7th and 8th. I don’t remember exactly the hotel, but you can go to CrowdfundingLawyers.net to check that out and get a ticket to that. Well-worth going to. Gene Trowbridge and Jillian Sidoti, two of the best in the country. We’re going to try to make it out to that one and hang out with them for a little bit.
Our first Virtual Buying Workshop of the year is the weekend after Valentine’s Day. I want you to fall in love with notes, February 15th to 17th. We’re excited to announce the Tampa Note Closers Group. It’s going to be kicking off February 20th in Tampa. That’s going to be on a Wednesday evening in Tampa Bay, Florida. We’re looking to do a live event there just for the evening with everybody and have everybody come out. We’ve got a busy schedule in January, something’s going on almost every weekend. February, three out of four weekends for sure. I have something going four weekends in a row or if you’re figuring last Traffic and Conversion. Also, the last weekend of February, we’ll be doing a live Note Closers Show taping in San Diego as well. Any questions on the schedule?
One of the great things that we’re doing in 2019 as I’m speaking or as I’m traveling to an event, we’ll be doing a Meetup at night along with a live taping of the Note Closers Show in the morning. We’re pretty stoked about that. Keep in mind of that. We may be doing one in Orlando. We still haven’t decided that for sure. We’ll be doing one in the Bahamas, that would be a lot of fun. Then probably first part in Orlando followed up by Tampa and then San Diego in February. We’re trying to kill three birds with one stone.
Avoiding The Grinch
Let’s talk about avoiding the grinch. I usually try to stay positive on these things. I don’t try to get too negative, but I thought there are a lot of people who are not in such good places. There are a lot of people struggling. Let’s talk about how to avoid the grinch. One of the biggest things that I have found, especially around the holidays, especially around in life and things like that, there are a lot of negative people out there. Let’s just face it. There are a lot of grinches. Who’s the grinch? We’re going to crack up about it. They go by a lot of people’s names like Debbie Downer, Negative Nancy, Bob the Bully, I Can’t Ivan, Sh*t Talking Steve, Political Paulie or Fakebook Frank. These aren’t their actual names. The names have been changed to protect the innocent. Based on all the stuff that I was thinking about and talking with psychologists and things like that out there, a lot of negative people fall into these seven categories. You just flip the names. It can be Debbie Downer or Negative Nolan or Beatrice the Bully or I Can’t Ivana.
What I’m trying to get is there are a lot of grinches out there. If you’re going to try to be positive, if you’re going to go out and do some amazing things, you have to try to avoid all of these grinches. You should try to avoid all these negative people from affecting your life. Let’s dive into it. Let’s talk about Debbie Downer. Debbie Downer always brings your positive mood down, always has something downing to say, a big huge energy sucker. You want to run from this person as fast as you can. Inside, they secretly want to take action. Debbie Downers want to take action. They don’t necessarily want to be a downer, but they’re literally scared of their own shadow. The best thing that you can do is to avoid them. You can try to drag them. You can try to hold their hands. Sometimes you can get through some things, but sometimes they just don’t want to play. They’re going to be always down, never up. You want to try to avoid these people. This is the best thing I can tell you. Especially this holiday season, you have a lot of people that struggle with the holidays. They’re not happy into the world. You’re out doing something positive, they’re just going to get upset. I’ve seen this happen in my own family. I just avoided them. I don’t say much because anything I got to say is usually in a good positive spirit.
Then you’ve got Negative Nancy or Negative Nolan or Negative Nick. Things are never good enough. They often go by the name or by the alias of mom or dad, the in-laws, aunties or your older siblings. You’re laughing right now because you know I’m right. Some of you probably dealt with Negative Nancy and Debbie Downer at Thanksgiving. They’re not going anywhere. The thing about that I have found with negative people is that they’re waiting for you to mess up. They’re waiting for you to say something positive so they can be negative to you. These are people that have a black hole for a soul. The best thing that you can do with them is either be silent for the most part, not give them anything and then kill them with kindness. That makes their skin crawl, killing them with kindness. Be a step above Negative Nancy or Negative Nick. You’re laughing about this, but you know I’m right about this.
The thing you’ve got to keep in mind is they’re going to try to project their own shortcomings or beliefs on everyone as a law to live by. What I try to do is I try to avoid negative people but if I can’t, then one of the best things you can do is keep them talking about themselves. You will find negative people, if you ask them questions about themselves, they’ll keep talking, they’ll keep feeding it and they love to talk about themselves but they’ll never reciprocate. They’ll never ask you the question. If they ask you, “How’s it going with you?” they are usually not Negative Nancy, but the negative people just love to fixate, they love to wallow in their negativity. Oftentimes they attract other negative people, so they wallow in the negativity together.
Bob The Bully
You’ve got Bob the Bully. These are people that are happy with the status quo. They don’t want you to rock the boat. They’d rather have fun doing what they are used to doing versus make something of themselves. They’re often working dead-end jobs they dislike. They’re often big on working for the weekend. These are the guys that are constantly doing things like going to the lake every weekend versus working on their business or they’re having a big barbecue or they’re big into the fantasy leagues. I laugh about this. They always ask, “Why do you want to do that? You can’t do that.” Any time someone says something that they think affects their ability and makes them feel smaller, they’re going to come back and bully you down. They want to drag you back into that group. Their greatest days were in high school or college when they scored four touchdowns for Polk High School. The best is to surprise them with a shut-up check.
Bob the Bully does not want you to do anything that’s going to help you get out of the hole that you’re in. It’s good to be down here with us. They’ll bully you into not taking action and you see this. There are Bob the Bully that are bullies with their family, their friends, their spouses, their kids. It’s a sad thing. They idolize Al Bundy. They are often wearing jerseys in public. I’m not talking about the game. I’m not talking about wearing a jersey at the game. I’m talking they wear it in public. It’s okay to wear the jersey every once in a while, going to a football game, basketball, hockey, whatever you’re dressing up like Clark Griswold in the Chicago Blackhawks jersey for a movie party, that’s fine. The thing you’ve got to keep in mind here is the bullies are going to try to pull you down and the best thing to do is not share what they’re doing or share a shut-up check. That’s the easiest way to get a bully off of you is confront them. Bob the Bully, if you call their attention that they should be doing something else with their time, they’re going to get upset. They’re going to literally act out against you, “You don’t want to do that. Why do you that? You can’t do that.”
I Can’t Ivan
Then you have I Can’t Ivan. I Can’t Ivan believe that they can’t accomplish things at all. It doesn’t matter who they are. They’re worried about what if the worst possible thing can happen, not what if it could happen. These are the people that will hang around, but they will never take action themselves because they have no self-confidence. They can’t escape their comfort zone. Their comfort zone is their prison. Anytime they have to get outside of their comfort zone, they run screaming back in as fast as they can. They like to watch but never wants in. This is the proverbial guy or gal who likes to watch. They show up to a lot of webinars, show up to a lot of things but is never pulling the trigger. They’ve got some other excuses about why they can’t do it, “My family or I’m so busy being this or that or I don’t have the time.” That’s fine. It doesn’t mean they’re not making money. It doesn’t mean they’re not working somewhere doing stuff, but they like to feed into the crap that they tell themselves that, “I can’t do that. That’s Scott, that’s Stephanie, that’s Bill or that’s Laura. I’m not them.”
What I would tell you is don’t waste your breath. I’ve always found that those who want to do something will take the steps to do it. I see this in my family when they’re like, “How did you do that? You try to share something with them. I can ever do that.” “What do you mean you could never do that?” “I could never send an email to my neighbors.” “Why not? Yes, you can.” You can do things and I think we’ve all struggled with I Can’t Ivan. He’s the close uncle for many of us. There are people on this webinar that struggled with I Can’t Ivan. I get frustrated because I see somebody who’s been on a webinar, coming to the workshops or doing it for years and I want him or I want her to do things, but they can’t escape their comfort zone.
Eventually, what happens is I Can’t Ivan’s comfort zones get smaller and smaller to the point where it literally strangles them. Then they either have to act out or it’s too late. They’re losing their job or they’re losing other things and they can’t get out of their comfort zone. Their comfort zone strangles them. The funny thing about this is they get mad when you try to help them. “No, don’t help me.” They get mad when you try to educate them, give them a book or talk to them about something, they’re going to get mad when you help. They don’t want you to help them because they don’t want your excuse to be successful. I’m joking throughout most of these because I guarantee we can all see parts of ourselves in these different parts of grinch.
Sh*t Talking Steve
Sh*t Talking Steve likes to talk crap about you behind your back. This is the grinch I hate the most. They’re totally jealous of your success and ambition. They totally bad mouth others openly. This is not guys, this is not gals either. What’s funny is when you confront them, they run. They always consider about, “What’s in it for me?” If they don’t get what they want perfectly, they don’t give a crap about what’s going on with anybody else. They don’t understand the community nature of things. It’s all about what’s in it for them? If they don’t get what they want or it didn’t count exactly as they want, they’re going to talk crap about you. Sometimes you’ll have private investors do this. Sometimes you’ll have people that you’ve helped out in the past that they were I Can’t Ivans to begin with and now they converted to Sh*t Talking Steves. They like to slander you at any type of opportunity. Slander is their best friend because they’ll try to get it.
The best thing I love to do is I love to confront these people. This is the best thing you can do. You can put it aside but eventually, at some point, you have to step up and say something to them. They’re like a big bully. Confront and move on. Somebody had been talking shit about Scott Carson or talking about it in my mastermind members, calling up my students, “No, he’s horrible,” I booted them out of my Mastermind. We’ve got it taken care of. Sh*t Talking Steve will not be talking crap on Scott Carson anymore. Sometimes you got to hire an attorney. Sometimes you got to come with a bat. You can turn a cheek so much and sometimes it works, sometimes they’ll go away, but sometimes you got to put them in their place. You know who I’m talking about ladies and gentlemen. We’ve all had them around.
What has popped up a lot in the last couple of years is Political Paulie or Paul. We all want to label women or men. We’ve got to be equal opportunistic grinches here. These people love to flop. They’re the extreme liberals or the extreme conservatives. There is no middle ground. We all have friends who are like this or maybe not friends, acquaintances. They have this huge lack of ability to see the other side. Maybe unwillingness or just so blind to their own cause, unable to see the other side. A sure sign of a Political Paulie or a Paul is they spend more time on Facebook than anything else. Facebook groups, they’re constantly posting political memes or gifts. The best thing you can do with these people is to get them out of your life. Unfriend them. They never accomplish anything. They only complain about everything, complaining about how life was a year ago or so and so.
You have to either do something about it or shut up. They only complain about the past. The past isn’t going to do you anything. There are a lot of political people out there and I’m not just talking about politicians. These are people that we all know. We see them in the different Facebook groups. I ask the question, some lady and I got slammed on because I was like, “Is that sexist?” I’m like, “Fine.” They always complain about the past. They bitch about being the victims. They’re not forward thinkers and you can’t win an argument. The big thing I can tell you is to avoid Political Paul or Paulie at all. Don’t get down that road because you won’t like how it ends. Arguments, this is a lot of the stuff that happens around the holidays with a family that has different political views.
Then you have Fakebook Frank. You’ll love this person, but you have to put them off on a quiet group on Facebook. Fakebook Frank lives on Facebook. They’re constantly updating everything there, what they ate for lunch, their bowel movements, who they’re helping, who they’re not helping. Everything has to be documented on Fakebook. It’s always positive. They always do amazing things. I laugh about this because you can’t always be doing amazing things. They say one thing, but then do something completely opposite. They bash somebody for doing something, but then they go out and do the same thing. It’s like, “You’re so fake.” We see this in the group. This happens a lot in real estate investment clubs where people talk about one thing and it was like, “Do as I say, not as I do. Shame on you for charging, but I’m going to go charge as well.” It’s like they’re pointing a finger and they have the other four point back at them.
They like to steal traffic from those that are working hard. They’re always commenting, “That’s awesome. Here’s what mine is. Here’s what I should be doing. Here’s what you should be doing.” I’m like, “Shut up. I don’t need you commenting on everything. You’re not the world’s best in everything you do.” They’re often guilty of spinning multiple plates. When you call them out, they’ve got that look like when I saw this thing of the Grinch, I laughed. They try to be Jack of all trades and they’re a master of none. When you try to help them like, “You need to focus,” it doesn’t go well. They want to do all and be all but realizes that if you try to do that, you can’t be an expert on anything. One of the big things that you will find with Fakebook Frank or Fakebook Fiona is eventually at some point, they hopefully come around and realize that they struggled. They often are chasing their circles because they’re doing a lot of things.
I only say this because I struggled being Fakebook Scott early on. I’m trying to do a lot of things in real estate and was not successful at that. Finally, I focused on one thing and put things down. We market a lot on Facebook, but a lot of stuff is rolling in automatically. Shannon does a great job with that buffer, post images, things like that, marketing the podcast but you know where I’m at. You know what lane I’m in. I’m not trying to be the world’s best fix and flipper, the world’s best wholesaler, the world’s best owner financier, the best turnkey guy. I want to do the best about raising capital. You can’t be a Jack of all trades. Otherwise, you’re a joke. You’re a fake. You’re a master of none.
Things to avoid this holiday season. No, we don’t want to avoid Cindy Lou. You want to try and have a pure heart this holiday season and it’s very easy to get drawn into the negativity. I have found that living by the bartender’s creed, being an ex-bartender for years going through college and parts of after college, was that you have to avoid this stuff. No religion, don’t get talking about religion. Everybody’s right, everybody’s wrong. Everybody’s God is greater than anybody else’s God. No religion and no politics. Two big things. If you can avoid those two things, that will help you out tremendously this holiday season. It’s okay to agree or to disagree. This drive people sometimes, “I’m going to agree with you that we’re going to disagree on this and move on.” You might want to write that down on your hand. Agree to disagree with mom, “Mom, Dad, I love you, but I’m going to agree with you that we’re going to disagree on this. You have a different view than I do. That’s great. I love you. Let’s move on.”
You can’t argue with idiots is the one thing I like to say, even though our family may not be all idiots. I get this, but everybody’s got some idiots out there. I have a huge Jerry Springer family and I’m not a fan of going home for the holidays. That’s why I love hanging out in Austin and doing things here. You can’t expect normalcy from freaking crazy people. You can’t expect from somebody who’s crazy, who thinks deranged, who’s off a little bit to come back with a normal response or normal conversation. They’re going to tilt it. Whether there’s a misbalance in some form or fashion, they’re going to tilt it towards their end. They’re going to try to draw you in. Negative Nancy, Debbie Downer, they’re going to try to suck you in and there are so many things out there that you don’t want to do. The best thing I can tell you all here is if you close deals, that’s going to hurt them. That’s going to kill them inside to see you being successful. If you’ve done a good job in 2018, it’s going to kill them to see you successful. If you haven’t had the type of success you want to do best yet is keep working and trust me. If you can give those people a shut-up check to go do something, it will add a lot of things.
That’s why we talked about taking action so much early. If you’re getting ready to close on a deal or raising capital before the holidays, that’s exciting. Don’t let these negative people draw you in. Don’t let these energy sucks so it’s like draining you. You can’t do that. Keep working forward. If you need help, that is why we have the WCN Crew about. Reach on to the WCN Crew. Shoot me a text message. I’ll give you the phone, let you vent. I will be your vent elf. If you need a vent to talk to somebody, do not let crap flow downhill. Crap should always flow uphill. One of the smartest things I ever heard.
The best thing you can do is to surround yourself with like-minded people. I know there are a lot of people doing some great stuff. I’m going to have some of my closest friends come in on the 13th and 14th here in Austin. George Antone, Merrill Chandler, Aaron Young, Megan, Kristie and Elijah Whites, Tom and Tracy Hazzard. We’ve got folks from Quest. We’re going to hang out for a couple of days and spend some great time helping each other’s business out and see how we can move things forward. You guys can all do the same thing. That’s why I’m advocating on you to push for Meetup groups. If you’re having a Meetup group, make it a good one. Make it a fellowship. Make it about trying to help people overcome their obstacles, trying to help trade and make deals happen. We’ve got some great stuff I’m excited about. I want to, first of all, give a shout out also to our international audience. We’ve got people listening to us from roughly 75 countries across the United States. The thing I want to tell you is there are grinches everywhere. There are also a lot of great angels and great people everywhere. I know many of you are doing amazing things, not only for your borrowers but in your communities and things like that. Keep doing that. Don’t give up on that.
Let’s share some of the great things. If you’re doing it, share it. Don’t be afraid to share it. Share the good things. God knows we have enough negative things out there from all the Debbie Downers, the Negative Nancies, the Bob the Bullies, the I Can’t Ivans, the Sh*t talking Steves, the Fakebook Franks. Don’t be one of those people. Go do something big, share something, empower the people around you and try to have fun. We’ll be taking off to get recharged and get rock and rolling for 2019. If you guys can do me a huge favor. A couple of things out there. If you enjoy Note Night in America, take five minutes and go on to iTunes, go on to Stitcher, go on to WeCloseNotes.tv or our YouTube channel. Like a video, leave a review. You can go to Apple Podcast, find them on their iTunes. Help me hit 100 plus. Help me take it to the next level. I would love to see what you like. If you enjoyed it greatly, leave a review. I appreciate it. This is our 103rd Note Night in America. We plan to throw out another 20 to 40 next year as well. This is our biggest night of the week, the biggest marketing event of the week because I’m being able to contribute to your businesses and help you guys out there. I’m very proud of what everybody is accomplishing, and we would love for you to go on and leave a review on the Note Closers Show or Note Night in America.
I’m excited about something else. We hit 200,000 downloads for the Note Closer’s Show podcast in our sixteenth month. Thank you so much, everybody, for being such a big part of this. Thank you so much for all those who listened and continue to download. We are rock and rolling along. We were hoping we’d hit it before December 1st but that didn’t happen, but that’s okay. Thank you to everybody that listens both domestically and foreign. Thank you for all the share and reviews. Thank you to all of you that watched, thank you to all of you that shared. It’s totally awesome. We are excited about the growth of the show. We’re going to see some more stuff. Go out, be merry, have some sheer, avoid the grinches and I guarantee we’ll see you all at the top.
- WCN Crew – Facebook group
- Fast Track Training
- Virtual Buying Workshop
- None Night in America on iTunes
- None Night in America on Stitcher
- YouTube channel for We Close Notes