The Suddenly Single Show with The Danielle Daily

Tom HazzardLeave a Comment

I married my college sweetheart. We were married for seven years. We went through the [economic] downturn and made our way through. Things were going well.

She was like, “Hey let’s get a divorce.” We were divorced in 60-days almost on the dot and she went her way and I went my way. We worked together for about a year afterward.

I found out she was doing more than running when she was going out running at night.

I was heartbroken really for about a week, really depressed. I look back now and it’s one of the best things that’s ever happened to me.

I drank a lot. I just kind of filled that hole with drinking and partying and hooking up. I had two DWI’s if that tells you anything. The first one was just a bad situation but the second one I was just bombed. I just tried to fill that hole with alcohol and shrug it off.

It was difficult. I didn’t want to get out of bed. I didn’t want to talk to anybody. I was kin dof self-destructive for a while and put everything into my work.

When you’re with somebody for 10-years and you’re building dreams and you go through rough times and come out the other side you think you’re going to be better. That was the hardest thing. It took a while to figure out what’s my compass now. What am I working towards?

I was going to go out and be the best possible person I could be. I found out a year and a half or two years later that one of the reasons we got divorced was she was jealous that I was doing something that I loved.

That was one of the best things that could have happened to me. Talking with people and talking with people who had been through a divorce. I talked to my dad spiritually, he passed about a year before but I remember having long conversations in my head with what would my dad think and my dad would respond.

I talked to some mentors, people who are still mentors to this day that really helped me get my mindset in the right place.

I dove back into doing a lot of reading. I dove back into holding myself accountable for making a lot of changes.

If you’re struggling, reach out to somebody. Talk to somebody. You’re not the only person’ who’s been through a rough time. I’ve always found my mentors and people who are at the pinnacle of success have always gone through several rough times. They really made their metal and developed who they are today because of those rough times.

We’re not married, we’re happy.

I just couldn’t take my eyes off her. We became friends and then best friends. We had the same type of humor and laugh and I could not do what I do today without her. I’m just very blessed.

We spend more time together than most married couples.

There’s a lot of growing up that takes place after college and I think you learn more about what you want to do. In a started marriage you learn more about what you don’t want than what you really like.

We get on each other’s nerves just like any other couple but the biggest thing is we have a lot of the same passions.

You’ve got to be able to trust the person you’re with. They’ve got to be your biggest cheerleader. I’m her biggest cheerleader and vice versa.

When you have someone you can trust they can carry the load with you.

Truly being present and listening to your spouse or significant other is important. You’ve got to be supportive and listen to your loved one and be able to read when they’re having a rough day.

We get up in our day-to-day sorrows that we have a hard time picturing what life is going to be like in 6-months or a year. Whatever you’re going through in a year it’s probably not going to matter. In 5-years it sure as heck isn’t going to matter.

My mentor is famous for saying in 5-years from now we’re going to be the same people except for the books that we read and the people that we meet.

We’re all just one introduction away from things revolutionizing.

Realize that things happen for a reason and it’s probably not you, it’s them. It is their issues. Figure out what the issues were and try to work on them. If it’s something that can’t be changed then it wasn’t meant to be to begin with.

It’s going to be okay and there truly is somebody out there.

Here is the link to the interview:

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